A mother in the United States chose to give birth to her daughter at home. This event, which took place after extensive planning, was also a very pleasant experience for the entire small family. There are some birth options that are more creative than others. In the United States, Rebecca, a dual-parent mother, decided to invite her 3-year-old daughter Hunter to her home birth. She desired to create a memorable family experience for her daughter and Rory, her newborn son.
Before Rebecca gave birth to her second child, she was determined to implement an essential aspect of her birth plan: she wanted to include her toddler. The Long Island mother decided to deliver her child in New York so that Hunter could be present. Hunter, a precocious 3-year-old, was actively involved in the delivery and initial postpartum period when the time came for her baby brother's birth. She did not merely observe the birth or cower in fear or confusion.
Despite Rebecca’s husband being initially skeptical about the idea of having Hunter present for the birth, Mark trusted his wife’s gut and understood the importance of this family moment. "Children perceive things based on how adults react to them, so if birth is not presented as frightening or traumatic, children will not perceive it as such. Rebecca remarked, "Birth is such a natural part of life and such an awesome occasion, especially for a sibling to be present at the birth of their sibling; it creates such an awesome bond for the rest of their lives."
Rebecca was never concerned about Hunter's reaction to the ; rather, she planned her delivery around the toddler. She states, "Having her present at the birth was one of the primary reasons I desired a home birth." I wanted Hunter to be as involved or uninvolved as she desired, and I did not want to be separated from her. Mark awoke Hunter and brought her downstairs in response to Rebecca's use of "we." Sitting on her father's lap and quietly asking questions roused her from her sleep, but she quickly adjusted to the situation. She began playing with her dolls and asked for a snack before amusing everyone with her innocent curiosity. Nicole Lahey, Rebecca's doula and birth photographer, said, "She would gently stroke her mother and tell her she was doing a great job, and she kept expressing her excitement to meet her baby."
As she was getting into bed, her husband entered the room with their 3-year-old son Hunter. Although the initial plan was for Rebecca to give birth in a hospital, she ended up giving birth to her son on the couch. "When Rory began to crown, the invited Hunter to be the first to touch her newborn brother," Nicole explains. Hunter eagerly reached over, touched his head, and remarked, "It's soft." Rebecca justifies her decision by stating that involving her daughter in all aspects of her little brother's birth allowed her to develop very strong ties with him, despite the fact that others do not share this view.
She was able to have skin-to-skin contact with him immediately after he was born, enhancing the intensity of this moment. The question then arises as to how such a young child could have responded so well to an event that has captured the attention of so many adults. Rebecca had extensive conversations with Hunter about what she would see and hear during the birth, so that Hunter would not be surprised or frightened. Hunter did not turn his head for even a second when his mother spoke, owing to his extensive preparation.
To all those who would like to share such an experience with their children, Nicole adds, "The best way to prepare them is to show them birth videos, discuss all aspects of it, and most importantly, present it from a positive perspective. Share the experience of birth with your children and teach them from an early age that it is nothing to be afraid of. "Conception is strength"